Pair celebrate friendship with 100-mile walk

THIS summer, they will have been best friends for 50 years.

Now, Stephen Cochrane and Stephen Hawkins will celebrate their long-standing friendship with a 100-mile walk for charity.

By setting up the Friendship Walk, they hope to raise money for nearby good causes and inspire other people to recognise their friendships in the same way.

They are planning to walk the length of South Downs Way, stretching from Eastbourne to Winchester between Monday, July 23 and Sunday, January 29 – the same day as the opening of the Olympic Games in London.

The pair, both now aged 61, met when they were just 12 during their time at Southern Grammar School for Boys in Portsmouth.

They have been best pals ever since.

Mr Cochrane, 61, from Hylters Lane, near Chichester said: ‘We both sat down and it dawned on us that we had been friends for 50 years this year, and thought we had better find a way to celebrate it.

‘Then we thought of doing a walk, and it seemed silly not to raise money for charity at the same time.

‘There must be people out there who wish to celebrate their friendships, whether they have spanned two years, or 82 years.

‘It’s about people getting out and about, getting exercise and recognising their short or long-term friendships.

‘This potentially could get hundred or even thousands of people involved in the Olympic celebrations while at the same time raising thousands of pounds for charity.

‘I believe that this could be of national interest and could ultimately be the community event of this Olympic year.’

The pair want people to take on Olympic events such as running, swimming, cycling, sailing and horse racing which can be arranged alongside their walk.

The charities which will benefit from the friendship walk are Fieldfare Trust, Cancer Research UK, Leukaemia and Lymphoma Research, and the National Brain Appeal.

Mr Cochrane added: ‘We have both had friends who have passed away with cancer, and I have had a friend who needed brain surgery.

‘We also wanted to raise money for Leukaemia Research in memory of a colleague’s daughter, as well as the Fieldfare charity.

‘There are a lot of elderly people out there who lack access to the beautiful countryside.’

Article Source - http://www.portsmouth.co.uk/news/pair_celebrate_friendship_with_100_mile_walk_1_3570526

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How to Impress a Girl on Phone

Sometimes men try too hard to impress a girl on phone and they forget the basic simple things that can guarantee them success when it comes to impressing beautiful girls. If you are one of those men who can successfully get a woman’s number but miserably fail to get a date, then continue reading the dating tips below. I am about to unleash the rules of how to impress a girl on phone, stay focused:

Step #1 Building up your own confidence and self-esteem

Congratulations you got her number. At least you can tap yourself on the back, you've managed to get a beautiful woman’s number and she is interested in you.

Now man up and be confident about whatever you say to her. Impress her by talking about your achievements, your job and if you do not have any of those then try to impress her by talking about your good qualities. Whenever you feel nervous, remember there are millions of single women out there you can date online and offline.
Women are not impressed by men who cannot even have a simple conversation and flirt with them on the phone – if you do not want to be considered as a loser, start by not talking like one.

Step #2 Act Natural on the phone

You've heard it million times before and yet you cannot understand the basic logic behind this advice. When a man likes a woman, he finds himself in this powerful urge to impress her. As he has no idea on how to impress a girl on phone, this makes him act unnatural and can clearly be seen in the way he talks, for example he will try to impress her by saying only ‘cool things’ and things that she wants to hear. The moment that he notices she does not like something; he will quickly take back the things he said and try to give it a new dimension. Believe it guys, women know when you are trying too hard to impress them.

Step #3 Use a flirty and playful tone

No I am not saying you need to talk like Jason Stratham. A flirty tone is something that you can develop with practice.
First of all practice a sexy hello. And whenever you flirt on phone, speak slower than you normally do and keep the same flirty and sexy tone, pause at the right spots and let the conversation take its natural direction-perhaps paving your way to her bedroom!

Step #4 Flirt with her and compliment her

Don’t use your flirty tone to tell her about how sad you are to learn about the Japan triple disaster! Flirt with her and tell her how much you love talking to her, compliment her voice and let her know that you cannot wait to see her again – let her know that you are not here to be just a friend, you are looking for more than friendship!

Step #5 Listen to her and show interests in her

Don’t just brag about yourself and try to impress a girl while you flirt on phone by telling her about your past sexual conquests – this is the perfect recipe for disaster. Take the time to listen to her, show interests in her, learn more about her while at the same time tell her things about you and how many things you have in common.

Step #6 Do not lie to her

The biggest mistake made by men who don’t know how to impress a girl on the phone is lying. Keep in mind the classic saying “A liar should have a good memory”. Do not lie to her; a connection which is made based on a lie never lasts long. Always tell her the truth, women appreciate honesty.
If you can master the above dating and flirting tips, you can be sure that you will double your level of success to get a date. Always bear in mind that success comes with practice and experience. So don’t give up yet. Sometimes you may do everything the right way and still fail to impress a girl; don’t take it personally, learn to move on, there are ways too many single women out there to be wasting time on a specific woman.

Article Source - http://www.howtoimpressagirlz.com/how-to-impress-a-girl-on-phone/

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Merely 40 hours of video gaming 'Can Cure Cataracts'

40 hours of fast-paced action gaming could improve the vision of people born with cataracts, a new study has claimed.

According to a psychologist, surgery and contact lenses do not always work, and people experience visual difficulties into adulthood.

However, some of these effects can be reversed if the individual follows a short course of "game therapy".

"After playing an action video game for just 40 hours over four weeks, the patients were better at seeing small print, the direction of moving dots, and the identity of faces," the Daily Mail quoted Daphne Maurer, a psychologist as saying.

Maurer from McMaster University in Canada has researched how vision develops in individuals born with cataracts in both eyes.

Previous research found that a 40-hour "course" of video gaming could be used to treat "lazy eye" or amblyopia, a brain disorder in which the vision in one eye fails to develop properly.

"Those improvements tell us that the adult brain is still plastic enough to be trained to overcome sensory deficiencies," Maurer said.

Maurer is internationally known for her work on "synaesthetes" - a condition that makes people's brains link different senses.

The study will be presented at the American Association for the Advancement of Science in Vancouver, in a session called 'The Effects of Early Experience on Lifelong Functioning: Commitment and Resilience'

Article Source- http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/health-fitness/health/Video-gaming-can-cure-cataracts/articleshow/11924482.cms

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What Women Hates about Men

The relationship between men and women has always been a love-hate type. This article will describe what a woman finds most annoying in her partner. Though this is a much debated topic, we know for sure that a woman never likes a man who is weak or shows too much of interest in her initially. Similarly there are many points that psychologists have tried to analyze. It would be very easy to put it down in a few simple points, but perhaps it is best to debate this topic by asking questions. How would you feel if you see your man with another woman enjoying a cup of coffee at the coffee shop around the street corner? Chances are, you would feel a sense of jealousy, even if the woman is just an office colleague who just wanted to feel a little relaxed. This is just an example and hundreds more can be cited. Any relationship can survive just on one sentence ’Trust me and I will never let you down’ If you really mean it, this can be the foundation of any statement.

Many Psychoanalysts often point out that women often contradict themselves while expressing what they desire and do not desire in men. Though women publicly admit that they like men who are strong, secretly they like a man on whom she can wield certain amount of power. Well for all the men reading this article, the Billy Joel song ’She is always a woman for me’ is how we would love to define her. No matter what, men will always enjoy the company of women. Let me now bring out certain points which women definitely find annoying in a man. Imagine your boyfriend calling you up every 15 minutes, when you are in the middle of a busy road. Regardless of how much you love your partner, this can become very irritating, as you would feel you are free to be on your own, due to the constant phone calls.

Now imagine you are on a first date and he starts talking about the amount of money that he has made in the stock markets or the new Ferrari that he has bought. I am sure more often than not a woman would not like to hear about these things on the first date. While do talk about what they do for a living on first dates, it is usually considered annoying and ruse for someone to brag about their earnings.

It is also likely (majority of the times) that a woman would not like a person who would show insensitivity towards her feelings. This is a mistake that many men make and women do not like this attitude from them. There are many other factors that women generally do not like in men such as arrogance, lies, submissive behaviour, etc. Never ever show a woman that you have a weak character. This is one of the traits that women dislike in a man. It is a mistake that many men make by making a woman feel that he is ready to fall at her feet. Contrary to a man’s thinking that a woman would appreciate it, women get annoyed with men who are too submissive and ready to do anything for her. This does not mean that a woman does not want a sensitive man who is open about his feelings, but it does mean that a woman still wants a man to be his own person, think for himself and claim what he wants from a relationship.

A woman’s relationship with a man is very delicate and she looks for a strong shoulder to rest her head. A woman always likes a man who has a big heart and ready to share and care. A self-centred man is rarely loved by women and more often than not will crave for female company. You are setting yourself up for failure, if you show undue interest in other women when you are with a woman. This is a behaviour that women dislike and will definitely put her off. Manipulative attitude is something that women dislike in a man. Hence, try to be as open in your behaviour as possible and at the same time do not fall prey if she displays manipulative behaviour. Keeping these points in mind, you can win over a woman. Remember that love blossoms slowly and you need to give your woman time and space if you really want to win her over. We have tried to explore few points that make a woman annoyed with a man. There may be many more and hence it is always advisable that you always be yourself when you are on your initial dates.

Article Source - http://www.love-sessions.com/what_women_hate_about_men.htm

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The Power of Love

Love is as critical for your mind and body as oxygen. It's not negotiable. The more connected you are, the healthier you will be both physically and emotionally. The less connected you are, the more you are at risk.

It is also true that the less love you have, the more depression you are likely to experience in your life. Love is probably the best antidepressant there is because one of the most common sources of depression is feeling unloved. Most depressed people don't love themselves and they do not feel loved by others. They also are very self-focused, making them less attractive to others and depriving them of opportunities to learn the skills of love.

There is a mythology in our culture that love just happens. As a result, the depressed often sit around passively waiting for someone to love them. But love doesn't work that way. To get love and keep love you have to go out and be active and learn a variety of specific skills.Bottom of Form

Most of us get our ideas of love from popular culture. We come to believe that love is something that sweeps us off our feet. But the pop-culture ideal of love consists of unrealistic images created for entertainment, which is one reason so many of us are set up to be depressed. It's part of our national vulnerability, like eating junk food, constantly stimulated by images of instant gratification. We think it is love when it's simply distraction and infatuation.

One consequence is that when we hit real love we become upset and disappointed because there are many things that do not fit the cultural ideal. Some of us get demanding and controlling, wanting someone else to do what we think our ideal of romance should be, without realizing our ideal is misplaced.

It is not only possible but necessary to change one's approach to love to ward off depression. Follow these action strategies to get more of what you want out of life—to love and be loved.

• Recognize the difference between limerance and love. Limerance is the psychological state of deep infatuation. It feels good but rarely lasts. Limerance is that first stage of mad attraction whereby all the hormones are flowing and things feel so right. Limerance lasts, on average, six months. It can progress to love. Love mostly starts out as limerance, but limerance doesn't always evolve into love.
• Know that love is a learned skill, not something that comes from hormones or emotion particularly. Erich Fromm called it "an act of will." If you don't learn the skills of love you virtually guarantee that you will be depressed, not only because you will not be connected enough but because you will have many failure experiences.
• Learn good communication skills. They are a means by which you develop trust and intensify connection. The more you can communicate the less depressed you will be because you will feel known and understood.

There are always core differences between two people, no matter how good or close you are, and if the relationship is going right those differences surface. The issue then is to identify the differences and negotiate them so that they don't distance you or kill the relationship.

You do that by understanding where the other person is coming from, who that person is, and by being able to represent yourself. When the differences are known you must be able to negotiate and compromise on them until you find a common ground that works for both.

• Focus on the other person. Rather than focus on what you are getting and how you are being treated, read your partner's need. What does this person really need for his/her own well-being? This is a very tough skill for people to learn in our narcissistic culture. Of course, you don't lose yourself in the process; you make sure you're also doing enough self-care.
• Help someone else. Depression keeps people so focused on themselves they don't get outside themselves enough to be able to learn to love. The more you can focus on others and learn to respond and meet their needs, the better you are going to do in love.
• Develop the ability to accommodate simultaneous reality. The loved one's reality is as important as your own, and you need to be as aware of it as of your own. What are they really saying, what are they really needing? Depressed people think the only reality is their own depressed reality.
• Actively dispute your internal messages of inadequacy. Sensitivity to rejection is a cardinal feature of depression. As a consequence of low self-esteem, every relationship blip is interpreted far too personally as evidence of inadequacy. Quick to feel rejected by a partner, you then believe it is the treatment you fundamentally deserve. But the rejection really originates in you, and the feelings of inadequacy are the depression speaking.

Recognize that the internal voice is strong but it's not real. Talk back to it. "I'm not really being rejected, this isn't really evidence of inadequacy. I made a mistake." Or "this isn't about me, this is something I just didn't know how to do and now I'll learn." When you reframe the situation to something more adequate, you can act again in an effective way and you can find and keep the love that you need.

Article source - http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200212/the-power-love

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